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Old 05-30-2008, 12:15 PM
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Default Old guys keep hitting on meee!

Okay. I like to dress up and look cute at work. Working suuucks. I work in a grocery store (and sometimes outside in the garden center at the grocery store) and it's boooring, the only thing that gives me joy is smiling and answering questions about enormous headbows I'm so fond of or my bracelets. You see?

But then there was this guy who worked in Bottle Redemption, and he'd always hit on me! He was like twenty-seven! It was boardering on harrassment, but he had a kid and I didn't want to get him fired. But he got fired eventually anyway.

So then they hired another one! >< this time he's twenty-five, but he actually wanted my number and sort of tried to push me into it. I told him the truth (that my dad would kill him) and he said "Wrong color?" because he's black and I'm not, and that was a REALLY awkward question, and then I told him he was too old, and he was like "You got a cell phone, c'mon." and I was like "Maybe in a few years." and he seemed to give up after that, but STILL.

Sorry that was so long, I'm still really flustered D=

But what do you guys think. Should I give up on looking nice? I don't want old guys to look at me, but I am a little annoyed that I should have to go to work scurvy like everyone else just because of these idiots x_______X

Has anyone else ever had this problem? >>'
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Last edited by augenauf; 05-30-2008 at 12:20 PM.
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Old 05-30-2008, 01:44 PM
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I can't say that I had that problem. Being 31 (32 this year) they probably won't hit on "grandpas" like me.
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Old 05-30-2008, 03:52 PM
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Default Be Firm

Oh, it seems like only yesterday when I thought someone who was 25 was old! Now I'm an old mama, same age as TechieGuy.

There is really nothing you can, you just have to learn to be firm because guys will be hitting on you for many, many more years. A simple smile and "no thanks" should work for most guys. And when guys get pushy, just keep saying "no thanks". Don't let them make you feel uncomfortable or push you into anything you don't want to do.

And, if a guy is making you uncomfortable at work, it really is harassment, which is illegal. You may not feel comfortable telling your manager (which you really should), but you could at least tell the guy to stop harassing you. Maybe you can say it in a funny way that lets the guy know that he's crossing the line.

Well now I really feel old after that rant! Good luck!
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Old 05-30-2008, 05:47 PM
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I'm in the 32 Club like NewMama and TechieGuy and like you said NewMama, I too remember the days when 25 or 27 seemed old. LOL But as NewMama said, it never changes. It seems I get hit on by more men at least 10 to 15 years older than I do people my own age. When I was a teenager it was men in their late 20's now that I'm in my 30's it's men in their late 40's or even 50's.

No need to stop looking nice, just create a clever "no thank you" line that you can use over and over again.
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Old 05-31-2008, 03:42 AM
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Yeah, I guess you guys are right...

I think "don't hit on girls at work it's unprofessional" training needs to be invented.
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Old 05-31-2008, 11:33 AM
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I was working today - I'm a volunteer at a charity shop - and this guy walked up to the counter, so I put on my "smile at the customers" face. Our conversation went as follows:

Him: Ah, service with a smile, that's always nice to see.
Me: *smiles back*
Him: Don't worry, I won't ask for you phone number.

He looked about 28-ish, I'm 14 I was amusing, I guess.
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Old 06-01-2008, 06:02 AM
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Default Be Firm but also watch how you dress

I'm a little older than Lisa and Technie Guy and I've been down your same road. Although you want to look your best, I also think it's good that you also don't want to look in a way that will invite unwanted attention either. i.e, very low-cut, revealing, tight-fitting clothing, you know what I mean.

It doesn't sound like you are but just something to keep in mind. And when you do get someone that you don't want to be bothered with, be firm when you tell them how you feel. Don't let them think for one minute that they would have a chance with you, now or in the future. You can be firm and polite at the same time.

And if politeness doesn't work, then we'll have to talk about some other things that you can do-

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Old 06-01-2008, 06:57 AM
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Being hit by older people happens all the time.

It can work both ways. Some younger women likes older men and some younger men likes older women.

If you are not comfortable with this then you did the right thing by telling the guys that they are too old.

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Old 06-01-2008, 12:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lajocar View Post
Being hit by older people happens all the time.

It can work both ways. Some younger women likes older men and some younger men likes older women.

If you are not comfortable with this then you did the right thing by telling the guys that they are too old.

I did, now he seems to want to change my mind I'm 18, he's 25. That's like seven years. No way! Not when I'm this young. If I was 30 and he was 37, that'd be different, but ><'

Anyway. I think part of the problem is that whenever he shows up, I get tooooo nervous to really be too firm. Next time I'll say something like "Hey, you seem really nice and I hate to see you waste all of your time on me." or something. Dx Maybe that will work.
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Old 06-01-2008, 01:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by augenauf View Post
I did, now he seems to want to change my mind I'm 18, he's 25. That's like seven years. No way! Not when I'm this young. If I was 30 and he was 37, that'd be different, but ><'

Anyway. I think part of the problem is that whenever he shows up, I get tooooo nervous to really be too firm. Next time I'll say something like "Hey, you seem really nice and I hate to see you waste all of your time on me." or something. Dx Maybe that will work.
I think that is a good idea.

Take your stand and tell him that you are not into older guys. A "No" is a "No". The problem is a lot of guys think a no means yes and that is a problem.

Alot of people will lie and say something like this "I have a boyfriend / girlfriend" or "I'm not into guys / girls"

If all else fails and you cannot resolve this peacefully, then tell your superior or the person in charge that this guy is harassing you.

Hope this helps

Last edited by Lajocar; 06-01-2008 at 01:10 PM.
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